They say misery loves company. When I'm miserable I don't want to see anyone's face and that's the truth. I rather just wallow in it till it disappears I mean...Why would I want anyone to accompany me, when someone was the one who usually caused my misery.
People suck.
They lie.
Cheat.
Steal.
"Smile in your face...all the time they want to take your place"
Have alterior motives...
They can be fake
And whenever I encounter these things it makes me miserable...I am a person and I'm probably guilty of everything on that list..so I'm a miserable hyprocrite..whatever I don't care.
I guess this is some kind of ode to my cuz ("Jessica" I'll call her)., How gay. But...I remember that summer I liked this kid, Jarred's not his real name but that's the I'll use.
(Quick note about Jarred and my cousins. They idolized him, they loved going to his house and hanging out with him, they thought he was so cool. Especially Jessica, my younger cuz)
So we're at his front door once again because he lived right down the street and, I'm teasing him about the moths and other critters on his house and my older cuz "Debbie" asks Jarred for a kiss. Meaning a hershey kiss, but she knew what the hell she was doing. And everybody knew there was a little something something going on between me and Jarred but Debbie didn't care. So my cuz asks for this kiss and Jarred kisses her on the cheek. And I'm like hold up, waite a minute, let me think about what you just did here. Debbie was elated, smiling her teeth off and I'm like...Jarred, so you're just going to just dip into my family like that?? And he looks like... what? Did I do something wrong? So I get "upset" not really, kinda pretend mad and I tell him he's a jerk etc...and he turns to Jessica to ask if she was mad at him too, and Jessica...I'll never forget this, turned her back on him and didn't say a word. Jarred was once her idol but now..he was the jerk that I proclaimed he was. Because she. had. my. back. And so we turned our backs on him together, and my older cuz Debbie, just went skipping on the way home in joy. And me and Jessica walked home, side by side.
That's the thing about Jessica...it's like, she wants to see me happy. No matter what. She's taught me how to be happy for other people...I wonder if she knows that? No matter what I do, she thinks it's the greatest thing in the world. When somebody makes me sad, she doesn't like that person...she turns her back right there with me. I showed her a picture of my ex's ex girlfriend We both know the girl is cute...or maybe I just think so...but without saying a world...only because she knows what I've gone through with my ex, this girl becomes the ugliest, bitchiest person she has ever seen. The first thing that comes out of her mouth is "She's looks evil...[shakes her head] bitch" and I laugh because she knows that's what I want to hear. She knows the girl isn't that bad...but she instantly bashes her to make me feel better.
Our bond is so strong and it's funny because I don't really know why. Because my Older cousin...I love her to death but I would turn my back on anyone who upset her but she wouldn't do the same for me and that's okay with me, I still love her and would stand by her if she really needed me. But with Jessica...it's almost instant, no words need to be exchanged, I tell her "so and so" pissed me off and she's right there going through it with me. Maybe that will change through time, maybe when she get's older that bond might disappear...but I will NEVER forget many times that she stood by me.
